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Big Girl Love

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Big girl love- Loving a woman that isn’t the normal size i.e. a woman that has extra meat on her body a.k.a the best kind of lover.


So many people believe you have to either be curvy or stick thin to get some one to really love you. I’m here to say that is not true. People say that because they’re either trying to make themselves feel better or they have a very narrow way of thinking. I hated seeing things on tv that always reinstated that “fact”. The whole time I was growing up, television always had a way of making me feel I wasn’t pretty enough because I wasn’t skinny enough. I’m happy it’s not so reinforced now, because there are all types of little boys and girls out there who are going to be looking for love. The last thing they need is for something or someone to tell them they aren’t capable of being loved because they don’t look like the average attractive man or woman.

Anyone has the capacity to love and be loved. Not everyone has the same preferences. Not a fact but an opinion; I think God gave us eyes so we could decide what is visually appealing to us as individuals. The problem I see with that most times is, people have the chance to go after the person they really like, but don’t because they’re afraid of what people are going to say about their choice. I know, because I use to be that girl who boys liked, but didn’t want other people to know they liked because I wasn’t slim. We gotta stop doing that, making it seem like a girl or guy isn’t attractive because they don’t look like the norm. That goes for everyone, not just over weight.

big love

I know there are a lot of us out here that won’t dare go talk to someone we consider out of our league. Reason being, fear of getting shot down or embarrassed. But I ask you, “How are you going to get that man or woman if you don’t face your fears and take a chance?” That’s what life’s all about, taking chances. You never know, the next chance you take may change the course of your life for the better. Besides, most people think that getting a man requires you looking a certain way, that isn’t always true. Nine times out of ten men want a woman that exudes confidence. As long as you have that, you can damn near get any man you want and that also goes for women.


I’ve learned that the physical has little to no weight in this world, if you have unwavering confidence. True, you are going to have those times that people will think of you in a certain way, but that’s only until you open your mouth and they get to know you. Once people see the confidence shine through, they almost have no choice but to think of you in a higher regard, as long as you’re exuding confidence and not cockiness. Those two things are very distinct, one attracts and the other repels. Make sure you’re unleashing the right one.

As I stated, I grew up watching things that painted big women in a unflattering light. These women were either the side chick, the pay master, constantly getting cheated on, the cutty buddy a.k.a the one they never wanted to be seen with. Every single one of these things happens to all types of women, doesn’t matter their size. But the media made it seem like by being a ‘fat’ woman or girl, you deserved to be treated that way because you didn’t look like a Rihanna or a Beyoncé. That couldn’t be further from the truth. I’ve learned people treat you the way you allow them to treat you. It has nothing to do with weight. So the next time you see a man or woman you find attractive, talk to them, see if you can get that number. You never know, they may be looking for someone just like you.

Once you love and realize what you have to offer, you take the power. Loving yourself is the real key to unwavering confidence. Once you learn how to do that, what someone else thinks about you, stops being the concern. What you think about them becomes more of importance.

Movies I’ve watched with plus-size women leads. Some are recent and others are from my childhood.

1.) <a href="http:// ” target=”_blank” rel=”noopener”>Hairspray

2.) BabyCakes

3.) Phat Girlz

4.) I Feel Pretty

5.) The Bachelorette

I couldn’t just leave you with only movie references. I had to give you a couple of books too. The only author that I know of that writes plus-size stories is Carl Weber. He also happens to be a really great writer. I think you might like what you find.

1.) The Man In 3B

2.) Torn Between Two Lovers

3.) Full-Figured 12

These are only books that I’ve read. I’m sure he has many more with and without a plus-size lead.

Photos Provided by: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/lezeleganceradio/2015/05/03/shes-pretty-for-a-big-girl-the-weight-factor-to-dating-love, http://confidenceisyou.blogspot.com/2015/08/big-girls-need-love-too.html, http://picsmine.com/49-catchy-thick-girl-quotes-sayings/, www.naturallyjorrie.com/who-says-big-girls-cant-slay-in-lingerie/