I’m sure if you’ve ever read any of my blog posts you would know, I’ve always wanted to be a best selling author. That is also true till this day. I’m sure I haven’t made it so to my inconsistency. But through the grace of God, I’m sure that’s going to change.
You see, I’ve always been someone who loves to love and feel loved. For some reason I didn’t realize you can give and receive love from more than your significant other. I mean I knew that; I believe I just didn’t value love from friends and family as much as I did from a man.
Now that I’ve realized love from friends and family is just as valid and important as love from a spouse, I finally except that I don’t need someone else to feel complete. The only thing I need is to except myself and love me better than anyone else ever could. The sad truth is; you will have someone who will love you. Hell, you may have a whole tribe of people out here who really care about you and love you; but you have to love and understand what you want and don’t want before you decide to enter into any kind of relationship with anyone.
I believe that is a huge reason many women end up in dead end situationships with men they thought loved them and wanted to spend the rest of their life with them. The problem is; most of us aren’t honest with ourselves or honest with the person we’re entering into that relationship with. That’s why we waste so much time, because we’re waiting for them to do what we think the should be doing if they really loved us and wanted to be with us. Rather than telling that man or woman exactly what it is you want to gain from that relationship. So many times we assume that we are on the same page, without actually confirming we are.
I also believe it starts off as friendship there’s a better chance of lasting and turning into much more. Part of the reason I believe that to be true is; getting to know someone with out sex being on the table, helps you to care more about getting to know that person. Rather than only want to sleep with them because they’re attractive. You focus is redirected to, and that is always a good thing. It’s better then thinking what’s between your legs will keep a man or woman. In the end you’ll find that to not be true.
Keep this in mind: Every man and woman are looking for different things in a life long partner. Some may want someone who is charismatic, or loves to travel, or loyal. The point is, if that person doesn’t turn out to have the qualities that you are looking for in a mate, it is completely fine to call it quits. Sometimes you may not want to because the person was such a great person. Keep in mind if you do decide to stay with that person, you’re not going to live up to your full potential.
Inconclusion, if you’re with someone who had you fooled; someone who made you believe they wanted all the same things, then come to find out they want none of the things you want out of life; leave. Many times what happens is we compromise. There’s nothing wrong with compromise, but many times once you start compromising you become the person who is not living their life authentically, because you’re stuck trying to make your man or woman happy.
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As Always
Shads Short Stories 