Self Sufficient- Needing no outside help in satisfying one’s basic needs, especially with regard to the production of food.
I felt like I really needed to do a post on this, because it seems like there are so many people who date only those with plenty money to spend. Back in the day that use to be the norm, but not anymore. Granted, there are a few people out here who do this and will take all kinds of ill treatment because of a dollar. Never understood that, but I guess that’s just the way the cookie crumbles.
Back in the day it us to be women marrying men because they were well off. By marrying men who had their own, it not only helped the women in these arranged marriages; it also helped the brides’ family. But these days most people do it for their own personal gain. Also even though it was expected and men knew exactly what they were getting into; most never felt used, because they always got something in return. It wasn’t good for women, back then but at least people weren’t maliciously using others to gain the life of their dreams. There was always a give and take; and eventually some type of caring or love that developed from truly getting to know that person. I think some marriages where stronger back then, than they are today, because of it.
Arranged marriages, aren’t something I think we should go back to; please don’t misunderstand. All I’m saying is; people had little to no other choice, but to make it work. These days it’s not like that at all. Most relationships have turned into temporary hook ups. There aren’t many marriages that have lasted the test of time.
Also, we never seem to see that the way we act towards one another has everything to do with what type of energy we’re allowing to surround us daily. If you’re a person who never really pays attention to the way someone’s energy affects you, please start. I’m very big on consuming others energy; I suck it up like a sponge. Just thinking about it; that may be why I don’t like being around a lot of people at once; because if everyone doesn’t feel the same (happy), it really starts to bother me, because their emotions become mine. When I tell you, I’m a true empath, best believe I am.
Men of Today
If you’re a man and you’re reading this, don’t take it personal. I know all of you aren’t like this.
Men of today seem as if they’re always trying to find their Suga Momma. If you don’t remember that song, click on the Suga Momma link above. I always hated that song! I understand the song wasn’t made for just any man. It was made for the person Beyonce was in love with at the time; but that is the last song I want to be referenced to. Men of today already assume a woman is going to take care of them. I refuse to have them think I’m going to be that type of woman.
It’s not such a bad thing when he shows his appreciation everyday. But, what if he was like most men, and started to expect it and get upset when you can’t provide or won’t provide; what then?
In my opinion the roles have reversed; men have become what women use to be. I’m sure this isn’t only true for one culture, but many. Men have become the woman, without being a woman.
Don’t think I mean woman as in feminine, I mean woman as it pertains to the ways of finances. Too many men will let their wife, girlfriend, baby momma whatever; work two and three jobs, while they’re only working one. Then they’re quick to say, “Your job not as hard as mine. You get to sit in A/C all day.” I really hate that. It’s like they’re discrediting all the hard work you’ve done. I thought it was because they really believed that, but now I think it has more to do with the way it makes them feel about what they’re doing. Either way, it’s to massage their ego.
Also, what’s up with these men who believe all they have to do is D you down real good and the rest will take care of itself. Sorry Bro, that’s not the way it goes. You need to get your a** out of bed and get to working. Those bills aren’t going to pay themselves.
Him having a job; doing what he’s suppose to do as a man. These type of men are a dying breed. There are to many Momma’s Boys out here. Not the good type of Momma’s Boy i.e the ones who take care of their woman and family and treat every woman with respect. No, most of us are getting that Momna’s Boy who loves his Momma, but knows nothing about respect because she didn’t teach him. So when he gets with women, he treats them just as bad as his mother; many times worse because he sees little to no value in creating anything with her. As a result; if the woman is the type to give him every and anything, like his Mom did or still does, he’ll take it and think he’s the prize because these women and his Mom have made him feel that way.
That’s why I’ve learned, you have to be stern and non bending with them. Once they see your sweetness a little to often, many start to believe; you’re a pushover and they’re able to get away with more because of your love for them. That’s why you have to stick to your word, so they’ll know; you meant what you said.
Make sure to have your own so you don’t have to deal with unnecessary disrespect and discomfort.