What is it with people trying to pin things on the soft spoken?! That really pisses me off! I go through this a lot, as I’m sure other people such as myself do. The problem is I have so much to say in my head, but it never seems to make it to my mouth. I’m always afraid I’m gonna hurt someone’s feelings. I know, I shouldn’t be worried about that because they weren’t worried about hurting mine. But I have a problem with treating people how I would like to be treated, even if they don’t show me that same courtesy.
There have been so many times I have bitten my tongue in regard for the next persons feelings or because I’m afraid of how it would negatively impact me. When I tell you, the people at my job be trying it, they be really trying it, managers especially. There have been so many times I have been threatened. It seems like some of them get drunk with power, because some of them like to pick on someone like me. If you don’t know, I am a very soft spoken, compassionate, empathetic person. At times those are things I like about myself, but other times I wish I was rough around the edges. I’ve realized because of these qualities people learn how to manipulate me easily, that’s what I hate the most. It almost feels like there is no place in this world for people that feel and care as deep as me. I say that because I always seem to get taken advantage of because of my openness. I can’t help it, I wish I could. But I’m learning I’m not the problem, the people around me that are doing the manipulating are the problem. I just have to love my flaws and learn to navigate this world, because it’s not going to bend for me. The problem now is learning to bend without breaking.
If you go through these same struggles, please shoot me a comment and maybe we could try to come to a resolution with each others help. And for those of you that are able to stand your ground, please give me some tips, so that I can learn to do the same.
I also wanted to thank you all so much for the support. Because of you I always have something to look forward too.