Short stories

Anti-Social People Person

What’s up? How are ya’ll doing today?

I’m sure you’re looking at the title and you’re like, ” Does that even make any sense?” To be honest, I wouldn’t have known anything like this existed if it wasn’t me going through it. It’s not fun, let me tell you that.

It’s like I love and care about everyone that I’ve ever come in contact with. But, most times I’m either afraid to say something or I’m on a crabby mood and I don’t want to say anything. Either way it’s uncomfortable.

If I weren’t so emotional and cared how others viewed me, I would be at peace right now. I wouldn’t be tormented by my interactions with others. Worry if I was nice enough, if I came off rude, or if they liked me.

What I’ve found out is; personality types such as the INFP( my personality type) are highly sensitive and are constantly seeking the approval from others. Learning this early on would have helped me realize why I’m so different from others.

I’m sure many probably won’t believe this is a real thing. But for me it has helped me a lot in realizing who I am . Also letting me know I’m not that weird because there are other people out there just like me.

If you’re a antisocial people person don’t fret because you have a friend in me.

As Always

empowering · Experiences · self-esteem

Self Worth

Good Morning!!!

I know I’ve been M.I.A for a good while now. That was do in part to my health. But as the days pass I’m feeling better.

Well let’s get to the blog; shall we?

I’m sure this isn’t the first time I’ve written about it or you’ve read something else from someone else regarding the same topic. But, I want to give you my viewpoint.

We always want someone who’s gonna do for us what the next person won’t.

But….. have you ever thought of it from the viewpoint of; “I’m that person who won’t do those things for myself?”

We hear it over and over again about self worth. How we’re not suppose to allow someone to come in and take up space if they have no respect for us. But we never think of; Why does it  happen in the first place?”

Many of us allow these time wasters and cum critters to waste our time because we weren’t taught from young how to spot and what to do when they come your way. That’s why you have so many Good women and men out here marrying and wasting decades with ain’t s*** people.

As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned; If you can’t have a great time by yourself, how the hell are you supposed to have fun with somebody else?!

So many of us are looking for another person to save us. Many of us go whole life times expecting to find that one person who’s going to take us away from all the sad, upset, confusing things or people that are our life. Not realizing we are who we’re looking for.

See, one of the saddest things to learn when you’ve lived all your days and still haven’t found happiness is;

You are your own hero. You had the power to change your reality all along.

So to those who don’t believe happiness begins with self worth and discovery. Please reevaluate your values and morals.

I’m really just trying to save those of us out here who have the mindset of, “If he/she leaves me, what kind of life will I have without them?”

There are people everyday taking their own life or someone else’s because the person they chose made a different choice and decided to be with someone else.

I understand love makes us do some crazy things while we’re in it. That’s why the best person for you to fall for first and always is YOU. One thing’s for sure, you’re never leaving YOU.

Might be a little corny but as long as you keep this in mind breakups will be way easier. “Self Worth Makes the Dream Work”.

Remembering that and really practicing it will put people on high alert as to how to handle you. What that means is; once people realize you’re good with them in or out of your life, they’ll either straighten up real quick or exit stage left. Keep in mind no love lost. It’s just you have found your voice and realized your worth; and you’ve realized you’re not down for the Tom Foolery anymore.

Enjoyed the blog? If so please make sure to Like, Comment & Share to help this blog to continue to grow.

As Always

Experiences · Informative · motivational · relationship · self-esteem

Never Settle

Hope you’re having a successful Sunday!!!!

Question of the day: Why is it necessary to give your all?

That question comes to mind because as far back as I can remember every woman around me has always been expected to give their all to the man they’re with. Why?

Many times these men don’t seem to do nearly as much or give as much as the woman they’re with. It’s like you keep giving and giving until you have nothing left for yourself. Now a days they say; “Take care of you before you think of taking care of someone else.” I’m happy that’s something that’s stressed now, because it wasnt back then.

When I was growing up; hell even now women are taught to cater to their man or another woman will. I mean really what kind of s*** is that?! So you’re telling me if there’s some nasty perverted thing he wants to do and I don’t, he has the right to cheat on me?…. I think not!

If you’re with a man that thinks like that it’s time for you to throw away the whole man Honey. What’s the use of trying to make it work? Clearly if you feel differently than he does about the situation; his view on it is never gonna change…. unless he loves you and is willing to do without.

But to all my women making it who realize they’re the prize, keep doing you. The right man in time will find you. Just keep your head up and never settle for less.

AS ALWAYS

empowering · Feelings · Informative · motivational · Thoughts · Venting

Pushover

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Have you ever looked at your friends and thought about how and why you became friends in the first place? I seem to do that a lot. I’ve noticed the type of people I usually choose to hangout with have very strong personalities. They don’t take to much off of anyone. I finally figured out why I choose these type of people as friends; because they say the words sometime I feel I can’t. Many times I’m too worried about the consequence or hurting someone’s feelings. I know many people probably are thinking, “Why would you care about hurting someone else if they don’t care about hurting you?” I can’t even tell you. I’ve always been like this from the time I was a little girl til now; at the age of 36. You think somethings would change over time, but a lot has stayed the same especially with me.

By having these people with strong personalities as friends, I was hoping some of their ‘A’  type personality would rub off on me. But it has been countless years later and I’m still the same soft butterball I’ve always been. To be honest I have a real problem with putting other people before myself. I’ve realized, sometimes it doesn’t matter if I know the person or not; I will still go out the way to help them. I’m sure many would think that’s a good trait; but it’s not so good when you do it all the time. In the end I usually end up being the person without. I find that people are going to only do for you if you have a stable balance of respect or they want you to do something for them.

In the coming months asserting myself is something I’m going to work on. I’m sure it’s not going to be a cake walk, but I’m going to put in the work because I don’t wanna be everybody’s pushover anymore. For the people that have my type of personality; I’m sure you understand where I’m coming from. It’s almost like you feel paralyzed to do anything about some of the hurtful comments or experiences you’ve gone through or are still going through.

I was reading a book called, Disease to Please. In this book the author was explaining how adults become this way; she said it had a lot to do with learned behavior during childhood. It’s almost like you found a way to bend to other peoples will so you could in a sense survive. The problem with this learned behavior is, feeling like you have to continue to live your life this way. For most people pleasers like me, it’s hard to shack that survival tactic. It’s something easy to learn, but not something easy to unlearn. For years I haven’t allowed many people to get close to me, for fear of being hurt. It almost feels like I’m powerless to protect myself, but I’m learning to take that power back.  Once I had a friend of mine I use to work with tell me; ” You’re like a wave, because you can work with anyone.” I know she meant it as a compliment but I secretly took it as an insult, because to me that just says; I’m too afraid to be myself because I fear people won’t like me for who I really am.

The one great thing about all of this is I have some where to let these emotions out. I’m thankful for that, and the learning experiences I’m still going through at the current time, because in the end they’re going to help me become a strong solid person.

Please SHARE, SHARE, SHARE.

Who knows, this may help someone who has been through similar situations as myself or are going through these situations at the current moment. Most people just want someone they can relate to.

Photos Provided By: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/44262008812015600/?lp=truehttps://lifehacker.com/how-to-stop-being-a-pushover-1625771201https://www.quora.com/How-do-I-stop-being-a-pushover?redirected_qid=5434568#!n=12