Short stories

Hi Possibilities! I’m here for it!

Good Morning Everyone!

I’m feeling pretty good today. There are so many things that are right with the world as there are so many things that are wrong with it. It all depends on your perception of the things around you. It’s so easy to see the negative when the positive is staring you straight in the face. I really never understood why that is. For that positive thing to stand out it has to be more positive than the negative is negative; if you understand where I’m coming from.

But other than positives and negatives, today is going to be the last day I’m going to be at my current residence. I have until the end of the month to move but I figured I would give the last week of peace to my roommate. For you who don’t know we started off in a relationship then the act he had been putting on the first couple of years became too much for him and that’s when he started showing his true colors. For a long time I thought I was over reacting when I had feelings of isolation and being smothered by his controlling ways. Then I got conformation from those around me that I was not crazy for thinking and feeling the way I did. They say what I so desperately did not want to admit; that he was controlling and not the right fit for me…..

I was going to say, ” I wish they would have said something sooner” but I understand why they did not; because they knew I wasn’t ready to hear it and as a result of that I would have possibly cut them out of my life. Then that act would have had me deeper entangled into his web of misery and control.

For the longest time I thought he was so controlling and judgmental because he wanted the best for me and because of the love he had toward me. Later I realized it was for his own peace of mind. See; he had been cheated on serval times and as a result he became paranoid and believed I would do the same. So going in I didn’t realize his foundation was tainted by all those past experiences he had with other women. See it didn’t matter how transparent I was through out, because in the end he accused me of cheating anyway.

So inconclusion I just want to say to the women and men in relationships you have to constantly prove your loyalty; you might as well quit while you’re ahead. I may be wrong but once a person comes into any kind of relationship not trusting the other person, people or thing they’ll never learn to let down their guard and let you in. It’s going to take a hard lesson to open their eyes. So don’t waste your time or energy repeatedly proving yourself to that person when you’ve done nothing wrong to begin with.

I really hope you’ve enjoyed this blog. As always I enjoy creating them for you. Please do me the favor of sharing this blog in hopes of helping it to grow. 

On Another note: Come try a soap that caters to you and your skins needs! Try LuLu’s Lavish Lathers a soap that not only cleans but provides your skin with the hydration and moisture it needs to remain or for some of you become smooth and silky to the touch.

As Always

 

empowering · Experiences · Feelings · relationship · self-esteem · Short stories · Thoughts

Married Man

Image result for married man cheating

Good Afternoon!!

I know it’s been a while since I’ve written anything. That is do largely to me trying to find myself; not really. I was trying to get trapped in another relationship. But the only people who seemed to come my way are men not worth my time. They all had some type of hang up about them. I’m not going to really get in to that, because we would be here all day if I did.

But like I stated in a previous blog, there was one guy I was interested in. Wasn’t because of his looks because he’s not that good looking at all. It was just that once I had the chance to meet him in person I already had some form of feelings for him. As we all know when you like someone’s personality or presence it makes you find them more attractive.

I don’t know why but it seems like I always attract and am attracted to the asshole; because that was exactly what he was. He would say things and not care how they affected me. Some part of my liked that, because he was being honest. I guess I appreciated his honesty because there are so many people around me that babysit my feelings. At least with him if he said something I knew he meant it. But that over time got old really quick.

The other thing I’ve failed to mention was the fact that he was attached to someone; they have kids together and everything. The only reason I continued to talk to him after that was mainly because of boredom and depression. As a friend he would be ideal, but nothing more than that. But me not knowing when to keep a guy as a friend and when to enter a relationship with one, I continued to let him pursue me. Making him aware that I am not fond of sharing and that I will never knowingly share a man I intend on being intimate with. But he kept right on and I let him.

To be honest nothing really happened between us, but it could have. Over time I really wanted to see what he was capable of when it came down to the dirty deed. But something in me just won’t let me go that far. Mainly because I know, no matter how long we’ve known each other or how close we get he has someone he is messing over to get with me. He always told me she knew about me; not me per say but she knew there was another woman he was engaging in sexual activity with.  He tried, and I wanted to let go, but him not being mine just made me so uneasy.

I thought of throwing away my morals plenty times when it concerned him, but then I began to think “Why”? I’m not benefiting out of this situation. Take for instance my car is beginning to over heat. You think he offered to even look at it or give me some money to fix the problem “No”; at the end of the day I am left by myself with all of my problems. So for me it’s a high risk, but for him he’s just playing a game. Trying to see what woman is going to be dumb or desperate  enough to except scraps of  a man instead of her own.

Final Thought

If you can’t be his one and only and you’re the secret, you’re getting the short end of the stick. I don’t care what you say.

empowering · Experiences · motivational · Venting

LIFE

Have you ever experienced a point in life where you felt stuck?

I’ve been feeling like this ever since February 20th, 2019 (the day I lost my job of 15yrs). Truthfully, it’s been longer than that. I thought it was going to be something easy to get over, but it hasn’t been. I have a job now, I’m grateful for it. The only problem is I know I could have been doing so much better if I would have followed my own drum instead of the beat of someone else’s.

When I think about it, I realize most of the choices I made in life have been what other people wanted for me. There aren’t that many things that I’ve decided on in my own. I guess I’m scared of being the one to blame when things don’t go well. I’ve realized in life you’re always going to have choices. I should be looking at it as a good thing, because it means life always has an opportunity to change for the better.

You see, so many times we go through things and concentrate on the negativity of the change or the lose, instead of focusing on how the change is going to benefit us or the people around us. It doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Slowly but surely I’ve observed how this change was good for me. For one, I’m way more focused on what I want. I’ve been able to post more regularly, I’ve published a book, spoken at an open mic night, soon will be starting a podcast, started a YouTube channel, and in a couple weeks I’ll be going back to college. I have to say God blessed me when he removed me from that place. At the time I didn’t see it. But little by little I can see his plan unfolding and I’m so grateful for this opportunity to live life again.

I know you all my not understand the emotion behind my words and feelings. But just to let you know where I’m coming from; I use to be someone who had no direction! I had a dog of a boyfriend from 19 to 28 he treated me like I was less than dirt on the bottom of a shoe. He constantly lied, cheated, stole from me, put me down in always imaginable, and disappeared sometimes for months at a time. Then to couple that with a step-father who insulted me, demeaned me any chance he got, and cheated on my mother constantly. That isn’t even the half of it. To be honest I could write a whole novel on my negative interactions with men including my sperm donor. I just don’t feel the need to, not yet anyway.

I have to say I’m grateful, even though sometimes I can’t tell if things are improving. One thing I know; they’re not staying the same.

So if you’re like me and life has brought you 180 you need to continue on that path and know most change is for your good. Even if it seems a little or a lot uncomfortable. For the things we really want in life we are always going to have to experience some discomfort in order to appreciate it when something good comes along.

 

If you can relate or have something to add, please leave a COMMENT, and don’t forget to LIKE and SHARE.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

empowering · Feelings · motivational · relationship · self-esteem

Should a woman fight over a man?

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This gets on my last nerves…. I never understood why some women think it’s their place to fight over a man. I could only understand fighting over someone  in the case of that person you’re fighting is trying to do something to harm your other half; but if they’re cheating that’s a ‘No Bueno’. There are women out here looking like fools fighting over men who clearly don’t want them. If you don’t see the signs, let me point some of them out for you.

Signs he doesn’t want your a** anymore

  1. He lets you walk in with out trying to stop you; when he knows he has someone else he just had sex with or plans to have sex with, in the facility.
  2. He hides nothing from you. You constantly find his phone unlocked with text messages, pictures, and calls from different people he has had sex with.
  3. He’s affectionate to the person he was creeping on you with out in public; because in actuality a part of him wants to get caught so he can be done with you.
  4. In the mist of a fight he sides with the other woman/man and helps them fight you.

There are so many more to add, but I think you get the point. What I’m trying to get people in situations like this to understand is: Love you more than you could ever love him, because at the end of the day your happiness is all that matters. If that happiness isn’t with him/her, so be it. Maybe you weren’t supposed to be with them in the first place. Know that love isn’t supposed to hurt and loving someone is supposed to build you up, never break you down. If that is happening in any relationship you have, you gotta to put on your big boy/ big girl draws and walk away from them and that situation. Think about it like this: A relationship is like a job. If it no longer serves you; why are you putting in your time and effort for something that you aren’t going to reap the benefits for? I understand emotion can make you do some crazy things, but you need to eventually take over and think logically. I get wanting to save your first true love. Me for instance, I feel as if I did everything knowingly possible to save my past relationship; but he just wasn’t into saving us like I was. That’s why it’s important to pay attention and watch a persons actions to find out if their intentions for you are the same as your intentions for them. Let them lead with action rather than words because it’s a whole lot easier to say “I love you”, “I only want you”, and  “I wanna marry you one day” rather putting in the work to show that you hold a special place in their heart and life.

I really hope this helps someone who might be on the fence about leaving a toxic relationship.

 Have you ever gone through a time in life when you thought it was okay to fight the accomplice and not your other half for what they did?

If so, how did you feel when it was all said and done?

Know you deserve better……

empowering · motivational · Rant · relationship · self-esteem · Thoughts · Venting

Cheating

 This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is real-monsters.jpg What is it with this world these days? People think you’re weird because you don’t want to cheat on the person you’re with. I thought that was a good thing; to be faithful. I guess many people don’t believe it’s possible to be faithful to one person. There are men and women out here trying to get people caught up in this cheating game. Trying to make you feel like it’s normal to have sex with someone that isn’t your significant other. I don’t know where they learned that, but it’s never okay to sacrifice someone else’s feelings for your temporary pleasure.

 If you feel like you can’t be happy with one person, why waste their time? Let them find happiness with someone else, because it’s clear you’re not ready to give what it takes to make a relationship work. I believe that’s what a lot of people fail to realize, is when you decide to enter into a committed relationship, it’s supposed to be only you and that person you decided to enter into it with. That is not the time you decide to get with someone else because you think your girlfriend/ boyfriend is going to be with you regardless of what you do! In many ways that could be considered as manipulation. Reason being, you know they love you and care about you, so you figured you could do what you did because you’re sure you’re going to get away with it because this person loves you and doesn’t want to go through life without you. But, I want you to think of something….. What if that person knew their worth, and decided they’re not going to forgive and stay with you because they love themselves more than they love you? What if they decided they were going to leave because the act you committed was something that showed them exactly how you felt about them?

 See the problem with most of us is, we like to test and try others, just to see how far we can go; but sometimes in the process we loose what we hold dear, because we’re trying to be greedy and have our cake and eat it too. If the person you chose to be with is something special  and you know you may never find someone like them ever again in life; show them how much you care. Stop letting this music, media and friends influence you to make bad decisions, where you end up broken hearted. Your relationship is really no body’s business but you and that person. Also when he/she leaves you because you thought you could be slick by doing them wrong; either by cheating, physically, verbally, or mentally abusing them; you have to deal with the pain of seeing them go. All because you thought pleasing you was more important then loving and being true to them.

 That’s one thing I’ve noticed about a lot of men, they ‘Commit’ then later down the line, cheat. Sometimes a few weeks to a few months after they committed to their spouse. Most times they do this because they know you’re a good person and they don’t want to loose you. But, I feel like if you’re not ready for someone like me, you need to let me go, so I can find my Mr. Right. I don’t need to be sitting up underneath someone who isn’t and doesn’t plan on doing right by me (I’m using men as an example because that is what I date. But I’m sure there are women out here who do the same thing). I always felt like; what’s the point of putting me through all that pain, when you could let me go and you have you’re fun, guilt free?This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is cheating-poem-712x1024.jpg

 Some women and men can stay with someone who is constantly doing them wrong; all because they have faith one day they’re going to change. I guess we all go through that period of believing that a person will change if they love us enough. But the reality is, they’re only going to change for themselves. Sure you might be a factor as to why they are changing, but you’ll never be the sole purpose.

Love of self is #1 everything else is secondary.


Photos Provided By: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/435230751479652772/?lp=truehttps://www.poemsearcher.com/topic/sad+cheating
Informative · Thoughts

Piece to HER Puzzle

disrespect-quote-6-picture-quote-1I’ve noticed men only acting like men when they’re trying to hookup. What is that?! I thought men are suppose to act like men all the time. They want women to act like women all the time, then they need to take their own advice, and do the same. IF I hear another man complain about what the next woman has on I’m gonna scream! Ahhhh!!! It’s so annoying! Most of them want to be the boss but don’t want to pay the cost. There’ve been so many men who want their woman to do what they say, like she’s their child or something, but also wants her to pay her own way and split everything down the middle. I don’t know about you, but that’s something that doesn’t sit right with me. The only way you’re going to get me to listen and do what you say is if you’re taking care of me. But even then I’m going to be rebellious, because 1.) I’m not your child, 2.) I’m a grown ass woman, and 3.) I make my own money.
Men calling women out of their name is a definite pet peeve of mine. I don’t get it, why do you feel the need to disrespect a woman?! I’ve seen men call women b******, h*** and a whole lot of other things I’m not gonna mention. Most times because she’s out of his or their league or because she curved him. Whatever the case, it never gives you the right to say derogatory things about a woman, and that goes for women too. I just wish we could learn to build each other up rather than tearing each other down. Everyone deserves respect until they prove other wise, these days people don’t think like that. Most people believe you are only given the respect you earn. I’m sure that’s a large reason as to why we have so many disrespectful millennials. It seems like almost every person that I’ve met born after 1985 has a really s***** disposition. It almost feels like, this generation is a very self serving one, who puts themselves before anything or anyone. That characteristic could be looked at as something positive, but it could also be seen as something negative. Especially when it’s perceived that you can throw away a persons feelings and needs just to serve your own. Summed up in one word A**hole.

how-to-get-rid-of-your-boyfriends-wandering-eyeAnother thing, many women are put to the test constantly when they’re in relationships. Time after time love and respect are tested, when women are in relationships with the wrong man. So many times women stay because “I love him” or “He’s a good provider” or “He’s the father of my kids”. It doesn’t matter if that man beat her within an inch of her life or says so many hurtful things til her self-esteem is none existent. Point is There are so many excuses for a woman to stay. But men I ask you, “Do you want to be her excuse or the piece to her puzzle?” Some of you may think, you’re that piece. Well I have news for you Honey, if she’s always crying, sad or mad because of something you did, sorry you’re not. In order for you to become a piece to her puzzle you have to bring something other than heartache and pain to the table.
In closing, most women just want to be loved, protected, and respected (cheating is a form of disrespect). If you’re not ready to provide those three things let her know, and stay single until then.!!!Attention!!!

Photos Provided By: https://www.lovepanky.com/women/how-to-tips-and-guide-for-women/how-to-get-rid-of-your-boyfriends-wandering-eye,