empowering · Experiences · Feelings · health · Informative · motivational · relationship · self-esteem · Short stories · story telling · Thoughts

Change is gonna come

 

Image result for beautiful couple black

 

“I love you! Don’t you get that?!”

Kayla was once again professing her love to Donovan. Something she did almost everyday. She loved him, but something wouldn’t let him except, let alone believe she could really love him.

Past relationships, broke his heart beyond repair. So now that he had someone who was really there for him and would never dare think of hurting him in anyway; he could not and would not believe it.

“Kayla I love you too. But you’re going to have to give me some time. Being with you has been like a dream. I have to be honest though; you are my dream girl in everyway…. except….”

Kayla had issues herself. She often found herself falling in love with men who were emotionally unavailable or extremely mentally and emotionally abusive. So far Donovan hadn’t seemed like he was either of the two. But they had only been together for 5 months.

Things with him had been so perfect, she was literally waiting for the other shoe to drop. She hoped it never would, but deep down she knew otherwise.

“Except what?!.. Spit it out!”

“Baby you know I love you?”

“Yeah… Just say it!”

“Baby…. you gotta work on your body.”

“What’s wrong with my body?! You always claimed you loved it before.”

True he had always seemed to be in love with every inch of her. But now that he had become comfortable with her and realized her loyalty; that’s when he knew it was a good time to dig his claws in.


1 YEAR LATER…..

“You changed. You aren’t the woman I thought I knew!”

Kayla hadn’t realized it, but she allowed herself to get lost in Donovan’s madness. In the beginning things were ideal. She loved and trusted him; he could do no wrong. She hadn’t realized it, but slowly she had become his chameleon. She learned how to bend and blend into the small pockets of space he allowed her.

By this time she learned all his likes and dislikes. There was very little she could say and do that wouldn’t upset or trigger a negative reaction.

The more time passed, the angrier and more detached he became. Things like random arguments about trivial things were common place. Right a long with Donovan taking multiple shots at Kayla’s self-esteem; through name calling, mostly pertaining to her weight. 

By this time Kayla had grown tired of his disrespectful underhanded antics. She wanted so badly to leave, but feared being a lone and loosing her independence.

How many of you are stuck in a situation that is unbearable? But you stay anyway because of your resistance to change or you believe the discomfort is only temporary and will eventually dissipate.

If that is the case, I’m sorry to tell you; you need to get more uncomfortable or even give up. In order for you to move through that or this dark time in your life to make it to the light.  

No one situation stays the same. 

Change will come….

 

If you let it.

If you enjoyed this post, check out my recently published book

 

 

As Always

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empowering · Experiences · Feelings · Informative · motivational · relationship · self-esteem · Short stories · Thoughts

Mr. Ideal

♛ MightyDontKneel ♛

Good Morning y’all,

 

I’m gonna be honest; this post is going to be about the type of man I have come to learn about through movies. One movie in particular; Fifty Shades of Gray. I’m sure a lot of you have seen it. If you haven’t; How could you not?! At this point you gotta be living under a rock! This is specifically for my women, because I’m sure most men haven’t or wouldn’t waste their time watching it.

Well let me get to the meat and potatoes.

Seeing love being displayed in that magnitude made me want to recreate something like that in my own life. But the trouble with that is, many times things don’t flow and turn out as well as they do in the movies. Most of us have to kiss a lot of frogs before we find our prince. Trust me I know. But, I have no doubt he’s out there. I just haven’t found him yet.

What I’ve realized while being on this journey to finding my ‘Christian’ is to just have fun with the process. Stop trying to make every man the one, because most of them are not going to be.

But when he does come…. I’m gonna be ready for that ass! There are gonna be so many things we’re gonna try and so many places we’re going to go. For instance, I’ve never been to an amusement park with a spouse or gone on a cruise or out of town. So we are going to be busy. But you know what?… Even if I don’t meet my ‘Christian’ I’m still gonna do all  those things. Whether it be by myself or with loved ones; I’m not gonna let one situation stop me from living; as I have all these years.

One thing I must continue to reiterate is; This life is to short to wait for others to catch up. You have to start being that dare devil for yourself. Go out on a limb and do that crazy thing you’ve always wanted to. Chances are if you’re waiting on someone else, you may never get the chance again.

Inconclusion

I want to thank you all so much for rocking with me. With my inconsistent ass. I know I need to do better, and I will eventually. Also if you aren’t living the life of your dreams right now, take a step everyday to make that shit possible. Oh yeah, make sure to have some bomb sex while you’re at it. I’m not getting none, so it’ll bring me comfort to know someone is.

 

Also if you need a good book to read and you like hood mixed with a little LGBT drama check out my book

            As Always 

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motivational

Message to My Supporters

            I’m sure people believe being a writer/ author, whatever you would like to call it, is easy. But it isn’t easy in the least, because you have to find an audience that loves to read and as time goes on that is becoming harder and harder to find. So many people are waiting for me to finish this book, but very few are giving me the support I need to finally finish. I almost feel like the book is going to flop once it comes out. I know i should only have positive thoughts about it. But I have been writing for months and there aren’t that many people who actually check out my work. All I’m saying is, it would be nice to know you all are actually enjoying and reading the content I’m putting out. Side note: To those that actually read my work, know that I really, really, really appreciate all of you. You just don’t know how much it means to me to knowing when I write something you read it and enjoy it. Please keep commenting, I really love to see what you have to say.

 

Also I’m going to forever write. It’s something I know was put in me to do. I don’t care if I find a way to get paid for it or not, it’s my therapy. The added bonus is knowing someone is listening. Eventually I would love to leave a legacy like other writers that came before me like Toni Morrison, Octavia Butler, Zora Neale Hurtson, Maya Angelou, and so many others. One day I hope I can reach their level of writing. One day I will, I’m sure of it because I’m not giving up!