What is it with people like me?! I don’t get it!! I swear I try to be a giving person but this s*** has got to change. I’ve been taken advantage of by almost everyone that I’ve ever known! I’m just pissed!!! There are no other words to say but that. I just wish people thought the way I did.
I’m trying to change that little aspect about myself because it seems it will never be reciprocated. I’m just tired of being tired. I’m tired of thinking someone will do for me willingly with out me asking them to do so. I don’t want to blame anyone but myself, because I let this happen time and time again. I feel it’ll be better for me just to be on my own because I’m tired of doing without while the next person is racking up because of my kindness. See, I’m the type of person that will do for the next person because I see it needs to be done. Most likely I’ll help or do something for someone and not think twice about it, until it’s too late. By then they have gotten all they can get and I’m left with nothing. I’m trying to stay leveled headed and not get upset, but it’s not working out to well for me right now. Every time I think of how much I’ve given and got little to nothing in return it pisses me off all over again!
I would love to know if you’ve every gone through something like this. If you have, what did you do to correct the situation?
I know I’ve been gone for a little while. Sorry about that. I’ve been gone because I had to move and my mind wasn’t clear enough for me to write anything. But now I’m back and hoping to get better.
Remember when I said a couple posts ago that all I needed was a nice upstairs balcony and quiet. Well I finally have that. But know, my balcony is being taken over by my boyfriend, and it is really pissing me off! I love him to pieces, but he gives me no say so when it comes to anything, and it’s starting to really get on my nerves! He knows that I wanted that balcony for my writing, but he decided that now he wants it. So he puts all his weights and bench on My Balcony. Then says to me, “I left you plenty room. What you getting mad for?” He left my barely a corner. Anyone that writes for a living or because it’s a passion, knows that you have to have that one spot that is set up just right, so that you can get the creative juices going. As I’m typing this it’s getting me mad all over again! I don’t know what I’m suppose to do, know! I thought I was going to have a spot that was going to be designated for my writing, but that isn’t the way it’s looking. I’m just going to have to get his lack of a better word stuff off of the balcony when he leaves. Because there is no way that it’s going to stay like this! That is the only thing that I wanted, and I can’t even have that! He has his stuff all over this house, and I always have to put my stuff in one corner because he’s always takin over!!!!!
I thought that things were going to be different. I let him do what he wanted to do in the other house because he paid more. But this time we are splitting everything down the middle, and I still can’t get what I want. I told him before we moved, I wanted that balcony for myself and now he’s trying to take over, my spot!! Every time I think about it, it makes my blood boil!!
If I’m over reacting please let me know. I don’t feel that I am, though.
If you have or are going through something similar, please comment below how you corrected or plan to correct the situation.
I hope you have a beautiful day, filled with love and purpose. See you soon.